Something interesting happens when you move up to the next level. Whether it’s from high school to college, college to national team or atom to peewee, the reality is that when most players make the jump from one age group or ability level to the next one up, they go from being the big fish in a  small pond to being a fish out of water.  I’ll give you an example.

 

This past weekend I was coaching at and watching a huge Midget AA tournament with 40 teams here in Toronto area.  I’d guess that I’ve probably met or worked with at least 40% of the players at the event through all the various clinics, seminars, workshops and tryouts I’ve run over the years.

 

I found it particularly interesting to watch the players born in 1995 and 1996 who are playing their first season at the Midget level.  These kids were one of the better players on their bantam teams last year and now they are playing at a level where the game is faster, the time to make plays in much shorter and players can be up to 3 years older. They were the ones who were put out on the ice when there was a minute left and their team needed a goal, were put in net for the “big” games, and were out there blocking shots when they were holding onto a one goal lead at the end of the game.  They were the “go-to” players.

 

Now they are up at the next level – and the playing field is very very different. While a few players will go from being the best at the younger age group to one of the best at the next level up, most players find themselves having to fight their way up the ladder, earning their ice time and sitting on the  bench during crunch time.  And that can be really really hard to handle.

 

When teenaged players, who are so passionate and committed to making themselves and their teams better, go from being the best to being just another player – their confidence takes a serious blow.

 

They are riding the “Confidence Roller Coaster” – where one day they can be the hero and the next they are planted on the bench barely seeing ice – and they start to doubt their worth as a player (and sometimes even as a person) as a result.

 

I remember when this happened to me the first time.  I went from being the “go to” player on my junior team here in Toronto to NCAA Division 1 hockey where I started out as a role player playing a brand-new position (I got moved to forward from defense in my first week at university).

 

So I had finally realized my dream of playing college hockey which I thought would be so amazing and I was learning a brand-new position, firmly planted on the fourth line and trying to make an impression in the limited amount of ice time I was getting. I went from being the top dog to being in the dog house.

 

If this hasn’t happened to you yet, it will.  At some point during every player’s career, they will find themselves on the outside looking in and questioning whether they are ever going to get the opportunity to showcase their skills.

 

:::  So HOW Do You Maintain, Gain and Build Confidence In This Situation?  :::

 

Because you know it’s going to be hard.  You are going to be sitting on that bench, just wishing the coach calls your name for the power-play or to go on the ice in the last few minutes to get the tying goal, and it might be a long while before that opportunity comes.  And you are going to find yourself thinking things like, “What did I do wrong?” or even worse, “Why does she get to go out there? I should be out there.” We’ve all had those thoughts before – where we focus only on what’s best
for us instead of what’s best for the team.  We’re not perfect.  We just want the chance to prove ourselves on the big stage.

 

And when you are sitting there getting frustrated that you haven’t had your big chance yet, you can’t rely on your teammates, parents, and coaches to build up your confidence.  You’ve got to do that yourself.

You do it…

==>  By SETTING goals and GETTING them. <==

The key to getting your mental game in check, pushing through those tough times and building up your confidence is setting goals and then doing whatever it takes to “get” them.

To go back to my story in college – I could have sat there on the bench, buried on the 4th line and thought to myself, “This isn’t fair. How come I’m not getting the chance to go out there?  Why doesn’t the coach like me?”  But I didn’t.

 

I thought to myself – “What can I do to stand out?”

 

Actually, if I’m being completely honest, I thought to myself –  “What can I do out there so that they have no choice but to put me out there when it really counts?”

 

So I decided that I was going to become the best forechecker on the entire team and create turnovers all over the ice.  I knew that my aggressiveness, energy and willingness to commit to being a team player (not worried about the “glory” but about doing my job and playing my role better than anyone else) would be rewarded.  So I pushed myself to be the best forechecker on the team, in the league, in the country.  That was my goal and it gave me an incredible amount of focus.

 

 

And you know what happened? Once I had focused in on that goal and committed myself to achieving it, I started to create a ton of turnovers on the forecheck.  I was starting to get the “lucky” bounces and setting my line-mates up for goals.  Then I found myself getting penalty killing time.  And as I continued to push myself to be the best forechecker possible,  I started to pop in a few goals here and there.  Then I started to creep  up from the 4th line up to the 3rd, then up to the 2nd, where I finally started to get that precious power-play time.  I eventually found myself being one of those players that the coach throws out in the last 2 minutes of the game to get that tying goal.

 

You can imagine how much my confidence went through the roof as a result.  And all because I stayed laser-focused on my goal of being the best forechecker possible. It wasn’t because my coaches were constantly telling me how great I was or because my teammates were giving me pep-talks – I built up my confidence all on my own.

 

Keep Working Hard, Dreaming BIG and Taking Action.

 

Your friend and coach,

 

Kim

 

 

PS – Click on the link below to get started with MENTAL PERFORMANCE PLUS:

https://totalfemalehockey.com/products/mental_performance_plus/

 

Kim McCullough, MSc, YCS

Director, Total Female Hockey
Girls Hockey Director, PEAC School For Elite Athletes